Day: January 20, 2009

Obama's Inaugural Address

My favorite parts of “Obama’s speech”:

bq. Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions – who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short. For they have forgotten what this country has already done; what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage.

bq. The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works.

bq. Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control.

bq. As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our Founding Fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience’s sake.

bq. Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions.

bq. For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus – and non-believers.

The Reign of Error is over

Goodbye and good riddance to the most incompetent President in our history:

One could be excused for voting for Bush in 2000 (maybe you thought the country could benefit from a guy who failed in everything he ever attempted?), but it was clear by the 2004 election that Bush was inept. So if you were one of the dolts that voted for him in 2004, you owe the country an apology. And don’t forget that helpful tip that you have now learned: you are unable to recognize the obvious. But don’t despair, you can turn that into a useful skill — your natural inclination is the opposite of what you should do, so just do the opposite of what you think you should do and all will be better. Here’s some examples for you… when you pick up a pen to write with your right hand, remember that you’re left-handed, so just switch the pen to your other hand — people will be amazed at your new ability to write! When your natural tendency is to push on doors that clearly read “pull”, remind yourself to stop and do what feels weird and you’ll save several hours a day that you normally waste trying to get into buildings. Eventually, you’ll get the hang of it. And hopefully before 2012.

I’m glad there won’t be any more of these, they’d be funny if they weren’t such an embarrassment to the country: