Havana’s 4 years old today. It’s hard for me to believe 4 years have passed already.

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I hope you read this years from now (and I hope I’m still around when you do):

Havana, I’m amazed how much you change and grow up so quickly. It seems just recently you could barely walk or talk and today you ask me to chase you around the house and you have actual conversations with me about your day. You talk a lot about how you can’t wait to grow up and get bigger. I wish you’d grow up slower – soon, I won’t be able to carry you or lift you over my head and you won’t even want me to carry you on my shoulders or ride on my back like you’re riding an elephant.

You’re a great big sister to Hudson (and I’m sure you will be to Eva too), you’ve taught him a lot and, you don’t realize this and won’t believe it when you read this, but he rarely refuses you, always listens to everything you say, mimics everything you do and looks up to you. If only you could finish potty-training him because we can’t seem to.

Four years ago, you were a challenge that I didn’t think I could handle, and sometimes you still are today, and you prove almost daily how unprepared I am to be a dad. Nevertheless, I’m glad I’m your dad and I’ll always do what I can to help you have a happy life.